As a newcomer dating in Shanghai expat world, I embarked on a journey to navigate the city’s romantic landscape, armed with curiosity and a willingness to explore and meet new people. From the highs of meeting potential matches to the lows of encountering scams, my experiences shed light on the intricacies of the dating pool in this bustling metropolis.
Join me as I share insights, advice, dates, and cautionary tales gleaned from my foray into dating in Shanghai expat.
4 Major Dating Apps for Expat in Shanghai
The varied experiences with online dating apps like Tantan, Hinge, Tinder, and Bumble illustrate the complex landscape of online dating, where user satisfaction can vary widely based on personal preferences, location, and the specific functionalities of each platform.
Tantan’s Poor Reputation
To most expats, Tantan has earned a notorious reputation in online dating platforms, labeled a “dumpster fire.” Its subpar user experience, marked by low-quality matches and a cumbersome interface, leads to frustration among users. Despite the abundance of dating apps, not all offer a satisfying experience, emphasizing the importance of design and functionality.
As a newly single people in China exploring my dating pool options in Shanghai and hoping to meet expat woman in China or Chinese women for serious relationships, my experience with Tantan has been really disappointing. Hinge, on the other hand, with its diverse user base, presents a better alternative.
However, caution is advised against potential scams, especially in areas like People’s Square and the Bund. Any success stories with Hinge in Shanghai to meet new people? My recent attempts to meet Chinese women left me feeling rather disappointed.
Hinge’s Varied Reputation
Hinge receives a more nuanced evaluation and is praised for its diverse and international user base, which appeals to users interested in meeting people from various cultures and backgrounds. This aspect of Hinge suggests an inclusive platform that transcends geographical boundaries, enhancing its attractiveness to users seeking a global dating experience.
However, it lacks popularity in specific Chinese cities, such as Shanghai, where it is described as a “ghost town.” This disparity in user activity levels across different regions indicates that while Hinge may excel in inclusivity, its effectiveness and appeal can significantly vary depending on the local user base’s size and engagement, limiting its utility in less active areas in the country.
Tinder and Bumble Overview
Many expats use Tinder and Bumble, which are well-known and popular dating apps in the dating world. However, the absence of specific pros and cons suggests that these apps offer a broad but varied experience, heavily influenced by personal preferences and geographic location.
In the past, when I was new in Shanghai, using these dating apps, I tried to meet a few Chinese women, and most of them didn’t even look like their dating profile pictures. They even happen to have a screenshot of my picture, not from the Chinese app. In hindsight, I should have seen the red flags earlier.
Dating App Issues
- Transient Population: The expat community in Shanghai is often transient, with many people staying for short periods. This transiency can lead to challenges in forming long-term relationships, as people may not be looking for anything serious if they know they’re leaving soon.
- Scams: As with dating apps worldwide, there’s a risk of encountering profiles that misrepresent the individual’s intentions, background, or relationship status. Scams targeting expats, such as catfishing or financial scams, can also be a concern.
- Privacy Concerns: Privacy can be a significant issue, especially for expats working in sensitive industries or roles. The use of dating apps can sometimes pose risks to personal privacy and professional reputation.
- VPN: To access many international dating apps, expats in China often rely on VPNs (Virtual Private Networks) to bypass internet restrictions in China. For dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, a VPN is indeed necessary. China also has its own domestic dating apps that are tailored to the local population and are readily accessible without the need for a VPN, like Tantan, Momo, and others are popular among locals and expats who are proficient in Mandarin.
3 Advice for Dating in Shanghai Expats
When it comes to dating in Shanghai, taking a pragmatic approach is key.
Letting relationships evolve organically avoids the pressure often associated with online dating and promotes meaningful interactions. However, it’s crucial to remain vigilant against scams and exercise caution when meeting potential partners.
1. Traditional Matchmaking Markets
Traditional matchmaking markets provide a contrasting approach to digital dating sites or apps like Tinder, emphasizing direct interaction and meticulous preparation. These markets focus on serious relationships or long term relationships and offer detailed information pamphlets and a structured environment for finding a partner.
While this method may require significant commitment and preparation, its community-oriented nature provides a tangible sense of engagement in the pursuit of romance, although it may not align with everyone’s preferences or dating goals.
2. Dating with Creativity
One creative piece of advice is using a WeChat QR code on a t-shirt to highlight innovative approaches to meeting Chinese people, although it may not suit everyone’s comfort level.
For those seeking unique dating experiences, various venue recommendations are offered. From enjoying Korean BBQ for a less talkative date to exploring the pleasant atmosphere of Xintiandi or indulging in local Omakase cuisine, there are options to suit diverse preferences.
Additionally, suggestions like the Vue bar at the Hyatt on the Bund and Bar Centrale on Yanping Lu cater to different atmospheres and budgets. However, it’s essential to consider the evolving landscape of the gay bar scene in Shanghai and explore alternative options like Hunt or mobile gay parties for those interested in LGBTQ+ venues and dates.
3. Beware of Scams in Bars and Restaurants
The mention of bars like Perry’s/C’s as potential meeting spots suggests a more conventional route to socializing and dating. Without specifying an age range, these venues can cater to diverse groups or many foreigners, providing a space for casual encounters and social interactions.
Bars provide a dynamic setting for spontaneous connections, especially for expats. However, always date with caution.
As I mentioned before, upon my arrival in Shanghai, I encountered a deceitful situation where a woman’s appearance vastly differed from her Tinder dating profile, signaling the start of a troubling encounter.
Our dining experience escalated as she insisted on an extravagant and sheer number of seafood dishes against my preference, leading to an exorbitantly expensive meal.
Despite my attempts to simplify the order, she consumed copious amounts of wine and added more items to the bill, resulting in an uncomfortable situation. The ordeal concluded with a staggering bill that far exceeded my budget, prompting me to label her actions as fraudulent and swiftly depart.
This incident emphasized the importance of vigilance in relying on useful tools or trusted resources like Dianping for restaurant choices, highlighting the need to navigate social settings cautiously to avoid scams and deceptive practices.
Wrapping It Up
Navigating the dating scene in the Shanghai expat community is a journey filled with highs and lows, from the excitement of potential matches to the cautionary tales of scams and misrepresentations. Through my experiences and insights, I’ve learned valuable lessons about app reliability, personal safety, and the importance of meaningful connections.
While challenges abound, opportunities for serious relationships exist, whether through traditional avenues like matchmaking markets or innovative approaches to their social circles. As expats in Shanghai, we should be vigilant and have a willingness to embrace the possibilities that lie ahead when looking for long term relationships in Shanghai.